Sunday, July 11, 2010


First post in God knows how long and it's going to be one that says "I'm moving".

Yes, I've had my time in this skin. It's served its purpose. And now I'm ready to return to my original home. Over 3 years after shutting it down I am finally ready to return to Teabags And Ashtrays.

Explanations will probably be forthcoming but I'll leave them for later. Right now it's all about getting things ready. Design changes, removing all but the final post from Teabags, sussing out what I want the content to be and all those other bits.

And on the subject of design, if anyone out there knows how to make 3D type banners and is willing to give me a hand, I've got an idea that needs implementing and would be grateful for any assistance.

But for now, I bid you farewell. I'll be keeping this site live for a while as I may return every now and again to post up some appropriate stuff. Maybe this can be my holiday home...

Saturday, May 8, 2010

A Lazy Arsed Photo Post

In completely reverse order because I just can't seem to get the hang of uploading loads of photos.

Thorpe Park...


Would you trust this Irishman with a gun?

Probably the slowest ride, but made my head want to explode on every loop. Only did this once.

The Saw ride. Absolute quality.

Must. Go. Faster.

Then there was Stealth. 0-80mph in not much time at all. Beyond awesome. Did this twice but would've happily stayed on it all day.

I'd like to thank the children in front for really making this photo. Your parents must be so proud.

And then there was the Women's Handball. With England vs Iceland. Unfortunately we got our butts kicked...

Spot the ball...

There was also some gurning...

And some running...

And some penalties...

And the view wasn't bad...

And finally...there's the final. Of the JP Trophy, featuring my team! Southampton vs Carlisle at the mighty Wembley Stadium. I was halfway through writing a proper post for this but I just felt I was waffling on. But it included running, money, really dodgy looking blokes, a lovely ticket sales woman, and a even better cup of tea.

From the outside, Wembley Stadium looks just like a giant shopping centre. Serious failure from the designers I'm afraid.

But from the inside, it's an amazing place to be. Especially with over 44,000 Saints fans to keep you company.

We ran out 4-1 winners. Which is always nice. The Saints fans started the customary Mexican Wave when a team is romping home to victory. As it rippled through the crowd we all cheered, right up until it reached the meagre amount of Carlisle fans. Who decided not to take part. Nobody likes a sore loser. So we all booed when the wave reached them. That'll learn 'em!


Tuesday, May 4, 2010


In 2 days time we've got our elections. Those of you outside the UK may have heard about this recently when our PM called some old dear a bigot off camera. Only the mic was still on. Que media meltdown.

I will, as usual, be making the journey to a polling station and leaving my mark somewhere on the little piece of paper. I'm quite firm in my belief that everyone should make the effort. Even if you void the ballot because you don't agree with any of them. All this "I'm exercising my right not to vote" is arse monkeys. It's better to turn up and write on it You're all thieving tossers than to say nothing at all. At least you've then made the effort to voice your opinion.

But I have absolutely no idea who I'm going to go with. I think we need a massive shake up and I don't think that any of the parties are capable. The recent scandal involving MP's expenses proved what we'd all suspected, that they were self centered morons with no interest in the public. Are these the sort of people I want running my country? I think not. They were ripping off those of us that put them into power, the very people that they're supposed to be helping. They used the excuse that "..the system was broken". I miss the point where this gives you the right to fuck me over?

None of the interviews or debates I've seen from any of the leaders has filled me with any confidence at all that they could fight their way out of a souffle. Let alone run a country. They all seem more interested in slagging each other off than offering up a sensible and feasible solution to a busted up economy. Or reducing crime. Or reviving any sort of industry. Or reducing unemployment. Or addressing immigration. I'm genuinely worried about what will happen.

And not one of them has promised to do anything about the weather.

For your listening pleasure...Paul Weller with Wake Up The Nation (and if you haven't got the album of the same title, shame on you. Get to the Great God Amazon immediately).

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Yeah Yeah Yeah

I'm not dead. Or lost. I'm just busy. But I promise there will be posts, mostly concerning...

  • Enthusiastic laps of international football stadiums with a damaged knee
  • How I was emailed by a bonafide sex offender. No, really. I promise I'm not lying
  • My issues with the entire being known as The General Public
  • How I watched women throw balls at each other
  • And why I think my local MP is a bit of a twat

I would also like to point out that I'm still reading via Reader but rarely comment due to Amazon.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Click Buttons

Through several random clicks of playing Catch Up on Google Reader, I came across a new fantastic read. Cynical Scribble comes highly recommended. By me.

Also, I've just taken receipt of the new Gorillaz album, Plastic Beach. On my first listen through, I'm liking it a load of Thumbs Up. So that also comes highly recommended. Again, by me.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Football Talk. Kind Of.

Just tuned in to Radio 5 Live to listen to Arsenal vs Porto in the Champions League. The moment the sounds passes through my speakers I'm greeted by Graham Taylor's voice saying...

"...Wenger is standing next to these young boys, waiting for them to come"


Tuesday, February 23, 2010

But I'm Different Now - The Jam

Oh yes, I think so.

Having an accidental Jam evening. So many great songs. Being able to put a playlist on of just 1 artist and not hearing the same tune come up more than once for a long time is, in my book, a Bonus. That may also be the longest sentence I've ever written on this blog. Anyway, no moving images, just Sound Affects.

And it seems the embedded copy/paste from Youtube to Blogger is working again. Double bonus.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

What The Bloody Hell...?!

I watched a video on the internet today. It was of a 14 year old girl, dressed like a Manga character, jumping around in her bedroom to some sort of Japanese pop music, wittering on about some gumph I wasn't really listening to. I managed to get to about a minute into the "dance routine" before I turned it off.

Now I'm not going to be rude about this kid, because I think that's a little unfair. She's only 14 right? But I'll post her video up on here and you can judge for yourselves as to how you feel about it.

The reason I watched this is because she's become some sort of phenomenon. Her videos have over a million views, mostly from Japan as I understand it. And now she's made the National News in this country. And apparently her debut "album" is expected to top the Japanese charts.

Please feel free to leave your opinions, I'd love to hear them. Before you do, check out the news article HERE and have a bit of a read. Take note of her attire, what the parents do for a living, and above all, remember that she's 14 years old.

I, for one, think this is wrong. On so many levels. Irrespective of the cultural differences between Japan (a country I love and admire) and the Western World.

"Rebecca is thought to be popular because she has big eyes, a small face and slender limbs". Well, that's one way of putting it.

Monday, February 8, 2010

It's About This Long...

I really think I'm just making it all up as I go along you know. At the weekend I went to buy some much needed replacement bed linen. My old gear, as with all old gear, was incredibly comfortable but becoming rather transparent. I feared it may go the same way as our dissolvable washing powder packet things (no, I don't know what they're called) and just not be there when I opened the machine door.

The one thing I do know about bed linen is that it can be quite expensive. Like towels. This happens to be all I actually know for sure. Also like towels, I had heard a rumour that it came in different sizes. As far as I'm concerned, towels have 3 sizes. Big, for your body. Medium, that go on the floor so you don't make it wet when getting out of the shower. And small, and they're actually called flannels.

I rocked up to TK Maxx (the cheap place for those of you that haven't heard of it) and went to their so called Home section. Basically it's full of tat. Lamps that look like Heather Mills spare leg, gold coloured plastic candle holders in the shape of exotic women, and those ball lampshades made of paper and circular wire. But I thought the chances of finding just a plain white duvet & pillow case covers had to fairly high, even there.

I had to get past the size issue first. There was Double, Euro Double, UK & Euro King, Queen, Super King, and some blank ones. No simple 3 size stuff here then. Not having the faintest idea how big my duvet actually is, I went about it in the most practical, common sense way I could. In my mind I visualised making my bed.... when I put the duvet in and hold it up to shake the cover down, my arms are about this far apart...and from finger tip to finger tip is almost my height, so that makes my duvet about 6 foot ish wide, and because my arms are just above my head, that makes it over 6 foot ish long...

It's at this point I realise I'm standing next to bed linen, holding my arms aloft with my eyes closed, shaking slightly. I look at the woman standing next to me, she's looking back. I manage a small smile and slowly put my arms back down before she thinks I'm worshipping pillow cases or calls security.

So I know I need something just under by just over 6 foot. I start to rummage through the stripey, spotty and pukey patterns on offer before I notice that the measurements on the packets are all in centimetres, or inches. Wonderful. Out comes my phone and I convert the dimensions. I'm beginning to think it may have just been easier to buy a new duvet and just match up the names on the packets. King duvet + King duvet cover. Finally, just shy of feeling like I'm on Acid having been staring at weird patterns, I find a simple white number that's just about the right size. Grabbing it with probably more urgency than I needed to show, given that I've already been branded a religious bedding loon, I make towards the sheets. No fuss here, they're all white. Biggest one available, that'll do. It'll fold under the mattress if it's too large. Next stop the checkout and I'm gone.

And it fits too. Sweet. Pillow cases didn't though. Way too big. I think I'll give it a while before venturing out to get bigger ones of those.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

There Will Be An Answer

Where do I start eh? Those of you that have been kind enough to keep coming back to check for updates, I thank you. I've needed a time out, not just from Blogging but from...well...everything really. Yours truly had become a tad lost on the journey we call Life and it appears I had forgotten to take my AtoZ with me. And to make matters worse, I just hadn't realised it.

But after some wholesale changes (no, I'm not becoming a woman) and a little self discipline I'm ready to take on the world again. Piece by piece. And that's what it's all about. Tackling things one at a time and not getting bogged down in the treacle of the mundane. No, I've not found religion, or had any really profound thoughts. I think I'm just becoming happy with who I am. A while ago I would've said "This is who I am and if you don't like it, get fucked". Now, it's more like "This is who I am and if you don't like it, then I'm sorry but I can't hang about and worry it or get frustrated by it, I've got stuff to do". Like living.

Get busy living, or get busy dying. A line from one of my most favorite films/books, The Shawshank Redemption. And that's 100% true. No matter what's going on, there's always someone worse off than you are. Cliche? More than likely, but some cliches ring true.

So to end what is an abnormally personal post, expect much more regular updates. Time to get back to what I love, and that's writing. Does it matter if other people read it? Not really. If those that do read what I have to say and like it, then it's a bonus as far as I'm concerned. I'm all about the Happy, the world doesn't have enough of it and that's a shame.

But when all is said and done, life can be Aces. If only you let it. As The Beatles said, Let It Be.

Saturday, January 16, 2010


Not sure if I should or not, but I did. Laugh that is.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010


One of the worst things about being male and having a cold is the unexpected sneezes when you're trying to go for a pee.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Eric Bibb - Don't Ever Let Nobody Drag Your Spirit Down



You might slip, you might slide
You might stumble and fall by the roadside
But don't ever let nobody drag your spirit down
Remember you're walking up to heaven
Don't let nobody turn you 'round

Walk with the rich, walk with the poor
Learn from everyone, that's what life is for
And don't let nobody drag your spirit down
Remember you're walking up to heaven
Don't let nobody turn you 'round

Some say yes, some say no
Some wait and see which way the wind blows
But don't you ever let nobody drag your spirit down
When we're walking up to heaven
Don't let nobody turn you 'round

Well, I might say things that sound strange to you
And I might preach the gospel, I believe it's true
I won't let nobody drag my spirit down
Yes, I'm walking up to heaven, people
Won't let nobody turn me 'round

You might slip, you might slide
You might stumble and fall by the roadside
But don't ever let nobody drag your spirit down
Remember you're walking up to heaven
Don't let nobody turn you 'round